Going through a divorce is hard, but the period after you have completed the process might be even harder. It may feel as if you are now all on your own and there is no one who can understand your state of mind.
However, the reality is likely different considering that the US is the fourth country in the world with the highest divorce rates. In other words, there are many other people who will understand what you are going through. And yet, if you don’t want to rely on them, there are still some things you can do to feel free after your divorce.
1. Focus on What You Love
The first thing you can try after your divorce is focusing on what you love. It might sound like an obvious thing to do, but it truly can make a difference. You already have a lot of negativity in your life right now, so it’s essential that you divert your attention to something positive, something that brings you joy.
Perhaps you enjoy spending time with your dogs. Then go to a dog park or to the forest and spend an entire day playing with them. They will have fun and so will you. Or maybe you like your job. Then try to find new things to do at work. A challenging project can be exciting to take on, but it can also help you take your thoughts off of your divorce.
Whatever it is that you enjoy, go for it. Now is the time to do things that make you happy and help you feel good. You can even try out new things that you’ve never tried before. It can be something out of the blue or it can be something you’ve always wanted to try. Consider pursuing something you wanted to pursue but didn’t have the chance to. For example, maybe you wanted to learn painting but never had the time to do so. Now’s the right moment for it!
2. Dedicate Time to Your Hobby
In a way, dedicating more time to your hobby is very similar to the point above about doing the things you enjoy. However, the difference is that your hobby is something you are likely very passionate about. When you just relax and read a book while drinking tea, you’re doing what you enjoy. But if reading books is both your passion and your hobby, then it could bring you even more happiness once you start dedicating more time to it.
Suzannah Martins, an expert from the writing services reviews site Best Writers Online, puts it this way, “Most people have some form of hobby. Some like to have a hobby because they hate their job while others have a hobby just because they like doing something. But if your hobby is your true passion, then that’s a completely different matter. Spending time on it can get you through the worst days of your life.
Indeed, there’s something special about being passionate about your hobby. If you like gardening or cooking or cycling or anything else as a hobby, now’s the time to treat it more seriously. Spend more time on it and maybe even spend some money. Buy new gear, tools or supplies for it. After all, it does make you happy, doesn’t it? You can even take up a completely new hobby or find a healthy hobby to add to your favorite activities.
3. Change the Scenery
Coming back to the same home where you used to live with your spouse can be depressing. In fact, just staying in the same town can keep you in that bad mood after the divorce. That’s why it can be a good idea to change the scenery. You can do this by visiting your family relatives, exploring the area around the place where you live or even going for a trip abroad.
In other words, you need to change your location in some way. More specifically, your surroundings. You probably have memories associated with different places around where you live. And these memories can come forward and make you feel all kinds of things you probably don’t want to experience right now. But when you find yourself in a completely foreign place, your brain won’t yet associate it with certain memories.
In addition to that, traveling can be a great way to put your mind off of your domestic concerns. Instead, you will focus on planning the trip, packing up and setting up everything. Then, once you arrive at your destination, you will simply be too excited about new things you are seeing to even have a thought about your divorce.
4. Start Keeping A Journal
While it’s a good idea to take your mind off of your divorce and try to focus on other things, it can also be helpful to actually think about what you are feeling. You might not realize it at first, but negative emotions and thoughts inside you can quickly build up before they explode and you end up with a breakdown.
Alejandro Morales, an expert from the custom writing reviews site Writing Judge, explains it this way, “Bottling up your emotions and feelings is not a good idea. In fact, it’s one of the worst things you can do. If you feel like you need to let them out, you should definitely seek out an outlet for doing so.”
This is where the journaling comes in. By starting a journal, you can write down all of your thoughts about your marriage and your divorce. However, you can write about other things in your life as well. A journal is simply a way to let you speak out through writing. You also can use best services on writing to improve your skills.
5. Spend Time with People You Love
Last but not least, during such a difficult point in your life, it’s good to know that you are not alone. Though it may feel like it, you shouldn’t give in to the feeling of dread and loneliness. There will always be someone who loves and supports you. And that’s exactly why you should spend more time with such people. Now is the time when you need the most, and if they truly love you, they will make sure to support and care for you.
Think about your friends. Even some of your coworkers may be close enough to you to offer you moral support. Turn to your family. Your children can support you just as much as your parents and other relatives. Moreover, you don’t even necessarily have to look for humans. If you have a favorite pet (or pets), they can be just as good at supporting you and bringing happiness into your life. As mentioned earlier, spending time with your dogs can be a great way to cope with your divorce.
Ultimately, divorce is just another step in your life and a beginning of a new phase for you. It can impact you negatively, but it can also bring positive change. This is why trying out new things or discovering old ones in a new light can be helpful for healing after your divorce and eventually moving on.