There is a lot of variation across households when it comes to parenting. The nature of the family and how children are raised are significantly influenced by cultural origins. The composition of the American population has changed during the previous several years. A diversity of parenting styles is determined by several circumstances, including immigration (which brings with it varied cultural, racial, and spiritual ideas), financial situation, and single-parent households. According to statistics from the U.S. Census Bureau for 2014, one-fourth of children lived in single-parent households, while three-fourths did so in homes with two married parents. When race and ethnicity are taken into account, these patterns change. Even though children may flourish in different kinds of family settings, statistics indicate that generally speaking, children who live in single-parent households do less than their peers.
Democratic Parenting: What Is It?
democratic parenting is Joint decision-making, respect for one another, autonomy, and accountability. In a democratic household, everyone participates in decision-making. It achieves harmony between individuality, limitations, and concern for the well-being of the whole family.
The assertive parenting style, put forward by Diane Baum rind, is another name for this approach of parenting. According to her parenting style paradigm, there are three different forms of parenting:
democratic vs authoritarian parenting
Parenting in an autocratic manner
Laissez-faire or permissive parenting on a whim
Things seem to be going well when we adopt Isabel's lax parenting approach—until they don't. Because nothing appears to happen until parents demonstrate that they "mean business," they then do a 180-degree turn and become dictatorial.
When we decide to adopt an authoritarian parenting approach, as Nate's parents did, we ultimately give up and veer toward permissiveness since being an authoritarian parent is demanding and not very enjoyable.
Pendulum parenting is seen in both of these situations. When we adhere to one of these approaches, we always err toward the opposite extreme, either because we question our strategy or because it is too difficult to maintain. One parent may tend to be more lenient and the other more authoritarian in certain families, which illustrates the pendulum effect.
In this parenting approach, parents are caring, recent supportive, but they also establish strict boundaries for their kids. By outlining rules, having conversations, and using logic, they try to manage kids' conduct. They consider a child's perspective, but they don't necessarily agree with it.
Children raised in this manner are often outgoing, enthusiastic, happy, independent, self-reliant, self-controlled, interested, cooperative, and goal-oriented.
A third approach is referred to as "democratic parenting." Democratic households are built on respect for both the parent and the kid, as opposed to the parent running the show (authoritarian) or the youngster controlling the family (permissive). In contrast to erratic swinging from side to side, this approach shows a steady road ahead.
What Dr. Betty Lou Bettner and Amy Lew (authors of "Raising Kids Who Can") refer to as "The Crucial C's" are provided by the cooperative, democratic method. A sense of Connection, feeling Capable, having Courage, and feeling that one counts are some of the Crucial Cs. The Crucial Cs are what every kid desires.
Special Time and Family Meetings are two strategies that aid parents in fostering connection. One-on-one time with one parent and one kid is known as Special Time. The activity is decided by the kid, and the parent is welcomed into their world. During this time, phones and other electronics are put away so that parents may concentrate only on the kid and the activity. Playing pretend, playing a board game, or throwing a Frisbee outdoors may all be done during Special Time, which is free of charge. Special Time is pre-scheduled, listed on the calendar, and has a start and finish time. Never is it removed from you as a punishment.
Another method to promote connectedness is via family gatherings. As they decide on weekly Family Fun by agreement, kids are exposed to the democratic process. Every family member gets a say, and weekly rotations are used for positions like chairman and secretary. When calendars are examined and allowances are allocated, upcoming events are noted. The Parent Encouragement Program (PEP) provides sessions aimed at assisting parents in putting both of these helpful strategies to promote connection into practice.
Encourage your child to feel capable and brave
By spending time teaching their kids how to do household chores, parents may give their kids a sense of competence. Young children take pride in being able to dress themselves and make their food. Older kids feel capable and brave when they know how to help out the family, whether it's cooking, cleaning, or repairing a squeaky door.
Encouragement is required for our kids. By "catching" them acting morally, you may assist them in developing their abilities. A toddler understands his parents are grateful for his assistance when they remark, "I observed you helped your tiny cousin put on his coat." A statement like "Awesome image" is not as meaningful as "I notice you utilized a lot of vivid colors in your painting," which lets a youngster know his parent is paying close attention to his artwork. Children who get encouragement will be equipped to handle the trials of life.
Tell your child that she matters.
Your kid will learn that she is deserving of your attention and that she has a say in family life if you include Special Time and Family Meetings into your daily routine. She will feel valued and a feeling of belonging when she is aware of her place in the family. She will feel confident in many settings, which will also help her feel like she belongs when she can take care of her own needs and contribute to her family and community.
It is simpler to adhere to the democratic parenting approach when we keep these requirements of children in mind. We watch as our kids can connect, feel strong and brave, and feel like they belong. Because they are obtaining what they need, kids who get the "Crucial Cs" are less likely to misbehave and act out. This keeps family members from swinging in different ways and keeps them going ahead as a unit.